Heart Scare

In March our family had quite a scare regarding Lindsay. He went in for a routine EKG that has to be done every so many years and it ended up coming back abnormal. Without making the story longer than normal he underwent nearly every possible testing on his heart to find out what was wrong and what treatment would be needed if any. One of the tests he did was he came home with all these probes on his chest and abdomen tethered to a small electronic device that recorded every beat and signal his heart sent out for 24 hours.

He came home with these on a friday night and saturday morning I had planned a fun date because his birthday had been earlier in the week and we didnt get to celebrate. Problem was our date was to go take pictures with his new present (a tripod to use with our camera) just for fun and to get out for some one on one time but Lindsay still had all these electrodes on and the electronic thing. Not a huge deal but its still hot here and we were outside and we were getting sweaty and he didnt want them to get itchy or slide from being too sweaty so our date didnt last long.

Plus along with this testing came a fair amount of concern and stress as to what this could mean for our family. He was not allowed to fly (non-flying status) as soon as the EKG came back abnormal and without a flying status that means potentially his career was on the line. If results came back with something being wrong or that the Flight doctors deemed not suitable for flying our lives would majorly change. From worst case scenario being us leaving the military and not sure what to do or staying in the military and cross training into a different career (that was actually Lindsay's biggest fear) to the best case, getting a medical waiver and continueing in the profession that he LOVES. I was a wreck but was trying to hold it together best I could.

Prayers were answered and in the quickest manner! We thought once we heard the cardiologists results it would still take about a month for each military (Aussie and American) to decide if they thought Lindsay could gain his flying status back. But we exercised faith and starting playing the what if game. Tentatively thinking about the possibility of our time in Oz being cut short and such. But nearly two days after the cardiologist gave us the results that Lindsay does indeed have an irregular heartbeat but he is healthy and doesnt need any treatment, just suggested getting his heart checked out more often to make sure everything stays looking good, we got word from both countries that he was given medical clearance and regained flying status! YAY for us!

I know that we are very blessed in many many ways to have a stable job with great benefits. One that offers us opportunity  to travel and gain experiences that most dont get to have. Lindsay is in a profession that he absolutely loves and I think would do for the rest of his life if the military worked that way. We are so blessed. Those three weeks were not fun for me in the least. Lindsay is so chill that he did well. Not to say he wasn't worried or stressed because I know he was but I think I was the mess. To think about all those changes coming so quickly.

I had selfish thoughts too....if we move now or soon, that is one more time I have to start from ground zero in creating a support network for myself in a new place, one more time I have to put myself out there to make new friends and get to know the best places to get the things I need/want. One more time to set up doctors and car insurance and all the other crap you deal with every time you move to a new town whether near or far or in another country. I just didnt want to think about doing that again so soon. Establishing new people and places for Erik and dealing with a new career. Not to mention learning what the heart problem would entail and dealing with that.

But the Lord blessed us and although a HUGE curveball was thrown into our lives and blindsided us we came out not much worse for wear. We are so grateful!

I have been stretched beyond my limits (or what I thought were my limits) a lot with this military assignment. I have learned a lot about myself....strengths...weaknesses....coping skills..........priorities....patience......true wants/needs...........and many other countless things. This assignment has been absolutely amazing in so many ways and sometimes I have days where I just wish I could call up my mom or Lindsay's mom or my best friend and her show up on my door step 10 minutes later. But I have learned that it is not good to dwell on that wish nor be jealous of those who have that, because frankly that is not my reality nor will it be for years to come. I have to find ways to cope now that will help me now. I need and want to embrace and capture everything I can get while I am here and now so that I can look back and know I have done my best in every way possible and didnt continuously crawl into a deep hole that is so easy to do sometimes.I have to look for the bright side, the silver lining, and usually that means looking at the two leading men in my lives to ground me.